Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Hard hoeing

My Dad had his knee replacement surgery yesterday morning. The surgeon told my Mom that the surgery went well, and since Dad had no cartilage left & all was arthritis, it was darn good he finally had this surgery done. Dad was in a great deal of pain as soon as he came out from under the anesthesia, & so they put him on a morphine drip. None of us remembered how sick Dad gets with morphine, until my sister came to the hospital that afternoon and witnessed the projectile vomiting. Dad just kept getting more and more sick as the afternoon progressed. Poor Daddy. It was awful. They switched him to Demerol, and he improved a great deal. I went into work this morning for a short time, and then stopped by to see Dad at about 11am. He looked so much better, so close to normal. Yesterday, he was one ill puppy. He's still in pain, but it was the morphine that was making him so sick. Dad had to get up and move this morning, and that was pretty bad, I guess. But when I got there he was sitting in the recliner instead of laying in the bed, and just seeing him out of that bed lifted my spirits. I tell ya, my Dad is pretty darn tough. Especially for a 76-year-old.

The surgeon stopped by his room not too long after the PT guy was there. I guess the physical therapy session was really bad. When the doc walked in, Dad looked at him and said, "You butcher!" The doc didn't quite know how to handle it, but then finally got a fix on my Dad's sense of humor, and busted out laughing. Wish I had been there. And not only because Dad's surgeon is one darn good-lookin' man with incredible biceps. I told Mom I was so taken with his biceps, I forgot to check out his buns, and Mom told me she didn't and his buns were pretty great.

Yesterday in the hospital, I ran into one of Sammy's friend's moms, who I just adore. I haven't seen her or talked with her in ages. Which is awful of me, especially after all I learned yesterday. Her name is Gwen and she is the mom of the beautiful little girl who died of cancer last year. Her son, Cody, and my Sam were best friends since they met each other in 1st grade. Except for this year. Actually, they started growing apart last year because Sam's passions are sports, reading and computer/electronics, and Cody's are hunting, fishing, karate & dirt bikes/dune buggies. Sam would be very hurt if I actually wrote the details here on my blog, so I won't do so. Suffice to say, it was a stressful afternoon and evening, but I believe my son has learned better the importance of being a nice person and a good friend.

As a parent, you truly don't wish to learn that your child is less than perfect. Especially in my situation, where I have close relationships with both my kids, and I have so very many reasons to be proud of my kids. Sammy and Joycie are both great kids. Good students, well liked. Smart, creative. Wonderful people. But that doesn't mean they always make the right decisions or always make good choices. It is difficult to face that shame and deal with it in a way that provides a good learning experience and a positive outcome. It is not fun to take the responsibility as the parent, either. I suppose that's why some parents don't and just let their kids get away with crap, and then turn into nasty teenagers and then assholes as adults. Making sure your children grow into nice people and responsible adults is not all flowers and butterflies and sunshine, sometimes it's a hard row to hoe. But my God, they're worth it. They're worth everything.

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